3/13/2013

Mascara/Photoshop

I've been having a pretty homely time lately!!

Usually I like, you know, putting clothes on and doing my face and all that, but I've had my hands full with some very dirty projects, and I just can't bring myself to get my clothing filthy and put makeup on and immediately smearing it off when I get shit on my face.  Honestly, though, I think it would be dumb to try to look fly while taking dust baths in filth.  I like looking nice, but I really don't think I am fooling everybody when I put makeup on, and I don't really care much if people see my regular human face.  I get pink and I got some red spots from old zits.  Oh, well!


Today, though, I thought I would wipe the grease from my face and hastily slap a little on, so you can see my new mascara.

I'm of a mind that there are two kinds of mascara:  regular mascara and bad mascara.  I just don't think it's ever amazing, but sometimes it's really terrible and smears or flakes or melts or makes your lashes look all shitty-n-clumpy.  Waterproof stuff is good in theory, but it is always clumpier, and the formula is always worse than the not-waterproof kind.

I also have feelings about mascara because it is the only cosmetic that they recommend you chuck, like, 45 minutes after you take it out of the packaging.  I understand that people don't want eye infections or whatever, but shit.  I refuse to throw away a $20 tube of mascara 3 months after I bought it, especially considering that I will go through no-makeup kicks where I might only do my face a couple times a week.  AAAAANNNNNDDDDDD am I the only one who thinks that some mascara is better after you leave it hanging around for awhile?  Actually, I know I'm not the only one, cause I asked my pal Joanna, and she agreed with me.  Benefit BadGal mascara is especially improved by letting it ripen for a minute.  It's like it's too wet or something, but once you've had it for a while and it's not as wet, it's nearly perfect.  I just accept my dangerous, living-on-the-edge way of keeping mascara until I personally feel I am done with it and ready to chuck it.  If I get an eye infection, it's my fault.  I'm okay with it.  I will say, I've only ever had one eye infection in my life, and it flared up immediately after I used a neti pot when I had a sinus infection.  I was definitely not wearing makeup at any time that whole week.  I think the neti pot just shoved infection bacteria into my eye area, and I am obviously, totally a medical doctor and know 100% about all that stuff.  But I digress!!

Previously, my favorite mascara was that Imju Fiberwig.  They changed the name at some point, though, and in between names it was hard to find, and then I had some irrational, residual hurt feelings about the name change and just didn't buy it again.  It's called D.J.V Beautenizer now (why the hell is that so expensive?)  That name just sounds moronic.  It can't still be good, because no reason at all!

After that, I flipped back and forth between BadGal and Diorshow (which is also inexplicably super expensive now?)  I also used Lash Stiletto, and the L'Oreal Telescopic Explosion (man, that name sounds dumb, too) Waterproof mascara for my lower eyelashes.  Those are all fine, but they aren't going to eat you out or anything.

Lately, though, I have been hearing a lot of people talking about Cover Girl Clump Crusher like it actually WOULD eat you out.  It seemed like the consensus was that it was the dog's balls, and made everyone's lives complete.  I was skeptical.  Then again, I am always skeptical.  Maybe my life would be happier if I just let myself be awed and amazed, I don't really know what kind of magic awaits those who choose the path of the rube.  It might be really great.

So, I thought I would try it out for y'all...  and you know what?  It was pretty good.  I've been wearing it for a few weeks, and it's alright.  It doesn't flake or smear as much as other not-waterproof mascaras, it's effective without looking like Tammy Faye, the brush is pretty good, etc etc.  I actually don't have any complaints about it.  It doesn't make me look like I have creepy Kim Kardashian eyelash extensions, but it's effective and cheap and you can't really beat that.

HERE ARE PICS!!  I thought I would be able to showcase it best all by itself, so I don't have any makeup on at all, or eyeshadow base or anything.  I just washed my face and put on the Clump Crusher.  Lookit:
Not too bad, right?  Looks like mascara. goes right on your eyeball hairs like it's supposed to.  It says "Very Black" on the tube, and it comes out of the tube pretty black.  When I wash my face at night, it still looks alright.  You won't win any beautiful-with-no-makeup awards with it or anything, but it is definitely OK!!

If your tube of mascara is getting shitty, and you are gonna buy a new one soon, I would say to go ahead and get this, because it probably wouldn't ruin your day.  I need to get a little stampy-logo thing like that Allure Best-Of guy, that says IT'LL DO!  Natalie's 2013 It'll Do Awards...  Clump Crusher would definitely get that stamp.

***************************************************************************

I thought that, since I have a pic of my eyeball on this post, it would be a good time to mention my Photoshop** policy.  It is not news that people use Photoshop, and it is not news that some people will use it to make themselves look like wax-faced, uncanny valley hell dolls to avoid having people think they look like a person.

SIPOM PHOTOSHOP POLICY:  I use Photoshop to adjust the curves and color balance of pics, crop them to the size I want, make collages, etc.  I do not remove things from my face that are permanent features of my face (ie lines, beautymarks, double chin) or change the topography (ie fucking with messed up teeth or a crooked lips or one eye that is bigger than the other.)  Any retouching I do is minimal... I want you to be able to see what my skin looks like, because otherwise I am presenting a product to you in a way that would create unrealistic expectations.  If my skin looks fucked after putting foundation on, I will leave the fucked up spots so you can see that whatever-brand foundation is useless.  I'm not going to buff all the texture out of my face, so other people who read this and are my age don't get anxious about how I appear to be Dorien Gray.  My mug is my mug, and I don't fuck with my mug in Photoshop.

That said, I will retouch some stuff.  I have a 22 megapixel camera, and those guys will take pictures of every single tiny thing on your face.  Like, if I dry my face off with a towel before taking pics, you will see lime green lint balls on my face.  I'll retouch those.  If I have a fleck of sleep under my eye, I will retouch that.  If I am doing a polish post, I will touch up the dry skin on my fingers... I used to not do this, but with my new camera it looks grody, even if my hands look fine to the naked eye.  You know what I am saying?  Minute shit that will make me look like Pigpen gets retouched.  Regular face stuff and imperfections and things like that stay.  That's it.  The Photoshop policy on the Super Black site is the same...  I don't change things so they appear to be something they are not.  I tweak the color balance so the polishes look exactly like they do in the bottle that is on the desk in front of me, THE END.

Just wanted to be upfront with y'all!  

**LOL at getting on Amazon and buying up some $700 copy of Photoshop.  Y'ALL REALLY NEED TO GO PLUNK DOWN FOR THAT!!



88 comments:

  1. Here's the thing - I don't throw out my mascara until it has run out. I don't believe the 3 month rule, because cynical (yay for cynics) me says this is just a marketing ploy.

    I know there's a chance of eye infections but I've just never had one before.

    There's the little jar icon with a number on most beauty products now, but does anyone actually follow these? I mean, I could write the damned date on the jar when I open it, or diarise it (imagining alerts saying "THROW OUT OLD MASCARA YOU VILE PIGGY" popping up on my work laptop JUST as I'm presenting to clients) but really? Does anyone do this?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm sure that as soon as I post this reply, I'm going to go get an eye infection, but I've had my mascara for at least two years and it is fiiiiine. I don't use it that much, and I only recently learned that you are supposed to throw it away every five minutes and replace it, and I think that is a waste of money. Off to get my eye infection for confessing this on the Internet.

      Delete
  2. Please do the "It I'll Do Awards"!!!! Natalie, you are my number one go to for beauty advice. I've since gotten all the Naked palletes, and am happier than a pig rolling around in sparkly shit. Keep up the good work.

    I will have to try that clump stuff, but BadGal is pretty hard to beat.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Cliche, I know, but I love Maybelline Great Lash in Brownish Black. If you have light brown hair that tends either to blond or red highlights, I don't think you can do better for the price. I hated it when they changed the packaging so that it is no longer that crazy lava lamp shape, but I'm paying for the color and the formula, not the bottle. (I don't set up my mascara on my dresser like it's a perfume bottle...) I also let mascara "ripen" and don't fret about the crazy 3-month rule. I don't share products that touch body fluids with my friends, so whatever with that. I did finally throw out a waterproof mascara I used for the first and last time at my wedding, since I just passed my 4th anniversary. But I've never found a waterproof mascara that wasn't clumpy as hell to begin with. I tried some "gel" type mascaras in the past, some Lancome and Clinique and whatnot, but in the end I always go back to the Great Lash. I'm not looking for super black and can't see spending more $$ that could be spent instead on overpriced lipstick to whip out of an evening purse. Maybe if I wanted some exotic color mascara it would be worth it...but I remember the 80s and as a result still can't get down with the idea of electric blue mascara for anyone other than Cirque du Soleil performers. Anyone remember the Maybelline "Sunset" colors fourpack eyeshadows and that wonderful product "Dial-A-Lash?" Then you know the atrocities of which I speak.

    ReplyDelete
  4. But it says you save one dollar! One whole dollar!

    ReplyDelete
  5. The only mascara I've found that actually needs to adhere to the 3-month rule is Urban Decay's Big Fatty. That shiz turns into mortar if you even dare try and go longer than that, good lawd.

    I'll have to check out this CG stuff. What's the brush like? Is it one of those plastic ones or is it a normal fluffy one, or...?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. it's one of those rubbery spikey ones. it's curved, so i apply it with the bowl of the curve, then flip it and use the spikey things on the hump side to comb it out. i liked the idea of the rubbery spikey brushes when i first saw them, but none of the mascaras i tried with them were any good, but this one is how i thought those other ones should have been when i tried them

      Delete
    2. I'm the same way, not a fan of plastic. But I will admit, the curved brush does sound intriguing. Thank you for your help. :)

      Delete
  6. Anyone else get paranoid about mascara? I know that there's the possibility for eye infections (I wear contacts anyway so it's pretty much inevitable), but I always have this little voice that seems to scream that wearing mascara will kill my eyelashes over time.
    I know they're just hairs and will fall out eventually anyway, but can wearing mascara weaken/dry out or kill lashes so they just kind of never come back??

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. i don't think that would happen... you need eyelashes to keep crud out of your eyes. if mascara made them fall out, it would be an issue. i assume it is mascara makers first priority to make sure the stuff doesn't make your eyelashes fall out. that would be bad for business, and you wouldn't buy more mascara if you didn't have eyelashes to put them on.

      Delete
  7. My eyelashes get shout-outs on the regular (of the "are those real?" variety) and I've never found anything better than Maybelline Colossal Volum' Express (yeah, it sounds dumb) in Glam Black or Very Black. It's maybe a little Tammy Faye Baker, but since I rarely wear any other form of eye makeup it works pretty well for me.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I love this stuff too so so much. It's also good layered over the Crump Crusher.

      Delete
  8. Never look back: http://www.benefitcosmetics.com/product/view/theyre-real

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. i was sooooo amped for this one, and i kept myself from buying until i needed a new mascara, and i HATED it. it's actually what lead to me getting clump crusher... i was so mad i didn't want to buy another high end mascara. i was real disappointed with it.

      Delete
    2. I hated that one, too! The lady at Sephora was SHOCKED when I returned it. The spiky brush hurt me and I didn't think it made my lashes look as amazing as everyone seemed to think it would...

      Delete
    3. I bought one of those Lash Stash things from Sephora and hated most of the stuff in there. I never thought the shape of the brush mattered much, but I find a lot of the plastic ones scratch my eyelid and hurt. I don't mind BadGal formula but the brush is too big for me. I bought They're Real! and I love the formula, but the brush is scratchy. After awhile, I felt like my lashes were starting to look spindly because they were so long. I think it has some kind of conditioner or growth enhancer in it.

      I am addicted to Buxom Lash, and L'Oreal Voluminous. Voluminous always does a little better after it's been opened a while. Buxom waterproof (I bought on accident last time) is the same as any other waterproof. Tres disappointing.

      Delete
  9. Maybelline Full N' Soft is still my jam. I haven't tried many or liked any since this shit came out in like 1998 and Sarah Michelle Gellar was the "face" for the commercials for it. I like it because it goes on nicely without clumping and washes off very easily. Compared to the 3 other kinds I have tried since then (clearly I'm an authority) it also does have a "softer feel" rather than being stiff or whatever.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This is one of my favorites too! I tend to rotate through and try a lot of mascaras, but this is always in my stash. Goes on easy, never clumps, great brush, makes my lashes look awesome.

      Delete
  10. I'm a sucker and I got the new Too Faced Better Than False Lashes thing. I got it because I put that on one eye and They're Real on the other, and the Sephora lady said the Too Faced one looked better. It is expensive like whoa, but it makes my lashes insanely long so I use it when I *really* do my makeup. It's my fancy mascara for sure. For everyday, I've been using Maybelline Volum'Express Plush, and I don't love it. It's waterproof and it stays on really well, but it doesn't do anything great for my lashes. I also have a sample of DiorShow Extase that I got in my Birchbox and it makes my lashes look great, but a few hours later it sort of smudges off and I end up with raccoon eyes. Definitely going to try Clump Crusher now, and ditch the Maybelline.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Do you find it hard to see sort of after you use the Too Faced one? I only use it when I'm wearing contacts, or else my lashes brush my glasses and get annoying, but I feel like I can always sort of see the flufflies from the #2 tube, no matter how much of the #1/#3 tube I put on. I love how it looks, but it just feels odd to me.

      Delete
  11. I have been loving Almay mascaras. "Get Up and Grow" is awesome despite the creepy name and the eye color specific ones are also awesome. I have the one for brown eyes and despite supposedly being both purple and sparkly, it looks like neither on my lashes. It just makes them look long and full and non-crispy. Neither one clumps on me, and both give more volume than Clump Crusher.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I second this. I started using Get Up and Grow last year and it's the only mascara that doesn't look like shit on my face late in the day, nor does it do that thing where it sprays tiny mascara crumbs on my cheeks when I first put it on. Also, it does seem to work better the dirtier the wand gets/the older the mascara is.

      Delete
    2. I swear by Almay One Coat Thickening mascara in black-brown. I agree that it is best after being open for a while - at least a week or two. I use it until it is dried out, add a drop of contact lens saline solution, use again until it dries out again. I used to be pretty prone to eye infections but I haven't had any trouble with this method (knock on wood).

      Delete
    3. Here, here (or is it hear, hear? do people still say that? oh well) on the Almay. It's the only brand I've found that doesn't dry out after a month and/or make my eyelids itch. Nothing pisses me off more than spending $25 on mascara, and having that shit dry out on me after six weeks. I've tried drugstore brands, department store brands, brands I could only find online... all the same. However, I haven't tried any new brands recently (not since before us lucky Albany-dwellers got our very own Sephora), because I'm pretty happy with the kind I use, so maybe there are better ones now? I am curious about the plastic brushes.

      Delete
  12. I usually throw it out after 6 months or if I get pink eye. I work in health care and I get eye infections fairly often (2-3 times a year) but that's not from dirty mascara it's from dirty children. I've been using L'Oreal voluminous million lashes for the last few purchases and I really like it. It feels expensive. I also had great success with various Rimmel mascaras through college.

    ReplyDelete
  13. ok i love covergirl mascara, lashblash length is amazing for natural looking lashes

    my main problem is curling! My lashes never ever ever stay curled... any tips?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. i just use a curler. i either warm it up in my hand first, or do a quick blast with my hairdryer on it and hold it in my hand a sec to make sure it's not too hot and then curl em. i usually use the dryer, though, because my hands are always cold. all my hair is really straight, even my eyelash hair, so i need a little heat to get the party started.

      Delete
    2. I use a $1 eyelash curler from elf.com and love it! The bad thing is, you have to order it online (as far as I know they don't have it in stores), but it's the best eyelash curler I've ever had. If you hold it closed for more than a split second, your lashes are over curled. Mine just broke after maybe 5 years and I got my mom to order a bunch of crap so I could get myself a new one without having to pay for shipping on a $1 eyelash curler. If you want to order and need enough to make the minimum for shipping, their lipglosses and brushes are decent, and they also have mineral makeup and more quality makeup products, but I haven't used any of them. If you want crazy shades of eye makeup, or something like that, a lot of their products are only $1 so you don't go broke trying new stuff out or buying makeup to wear just once. :)

      Delete
    3. http://www.target.com/p/e-l-f-eyelash-curler/-/A-13962225 Is this the Elf one Melissa? Apparently you can get it at Target. I use a $3 one from Target that's okay, but I may have to try the Elf one!

      And Lauren, if you're not having luck with metal curlers then try a plastic one-- I had one years ago that was the absolute shit. And I would definitely second Natalie's hairdryer trick over those stupid fancy heated curling wands--they're dangerous and they suck. Also make sure you're getting the curler all the way to the base of your lashes, squeeze tight and hold, and do it BEFORE mascara (but sometimes an extra squeeze after the mascara dries helps too). My lashes are stick straight too :)

      Delete
    4. That's the one! It looks a little different from the one I got years ago, but hopefully it works exactly the same - I'll know tomorrow because my order came in and I'll get the new one tonight. Probably maybe should have checked for stores before talking my mom into ordering a bunch of stuff from there :) Also, if you do go on their website, it's eyeslipsface.com, not elf.com because that's some other website for lubricants which I doubt you have use for, or maybe you do, what do I know?

      Anyways, if you see it at Target, definitely try it! I'll report back if I try the new one and it sucks or something!

      Delete
    5. Thanks guys, ill def have to try heating it up, i used a heated curer but it just pissed me off
      elf is a great company i met the creator, scott vincent borba hes alittle weird haha (i met him cause i worked for walgreens and he also made the brand "borba" walgreens sells it and my store was the highest grossing in our district or something)
      Their brushes are pretty decent thanks for the heads up

      Delete
  14. The 3 month thing is ridiculous. I'm still using a thing of mascara I got right before my wedding in 2010. I'm not going to get rid of it just because it's old. It was expensive and it's awesome so I'm not chucking it until it runs out, turns to goo or gives me some kind of infection.

    ReplyDelete
  15. I usually stick with good ol' Maybelline Great Lash (with a standard fluffy brush, not a weirdo rubbery one) and/or Full 'n' Soft, but the last couple times I've gone to Sephora one of the Beauty Insider gifts was a Clinique mascara which I've really been digging. Thus far it has a really great consistency and the brush works well with my lashes. I had a mini-size BadGal but it was clumpy and dry pretty much from the get-go, but I'm thinking of giving it another shot.
    I've always been pretty suspicious of the 3-month rule, because 1) my mascara's never gone bunk after 3 months and 2) how much mascara do you have to use that the amount in a standard-size tube is gone or nearly gone in 3 months? Seems like a marketing ploy to me...

    ReplyDelete
  16. I normally get Macy's gift cards from my uncle for Christmas. So I replace my mascaras once a year and that works for me. Because any longer than a year and I start to not be as impressed with their performance.

    ReplyDelete
  17. My fiance and I are both huge saps, so I realized the other day that I needed to look into some waterproof mascara for the wedding. Which is over a year and a half away, still, so no huge rush. Then I walked from the train to my office in that bullshit snowstorm last Friday (ah, New England...). I chatted with no less than 3 men in the office before I looked in the mirror and saw mascara all over my face and not one of them said anything. So the waterproof need became more urgent. I was due for a new one anyway (I replace mine every 6 months--out of boredom as much as anything), so I picked up a tube of Clinique High Impact Waterproof. So far I really like it (I love the idea of "It'll Do" Awards--that's really all mascara ever is to me). It is not clumpy AT ALL. Smoother than most of the non-waterproof varieties I've used, in fact. I can do a couple coats and it doesn't even think about clumping. I have not yet tested its waterproofyness but it certainly seems way less smudgy than the Lancome I was using before. I love BadGal, but it ALWAYS smudges under my eyes by the end of the day. Maybe I'll give BadGal Waterproof a try after I'm done with the Clinique.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'll have to check that one out. I have eye allergies, so it's pretty much inevitable that my eyes will start watering at some point in the day. I have some Maybelline waterproof mascara, but I don't like it that much. It doesn't give me a lot of clumps, but it has little globs or mascara crumbs or something. Not terrible, but not that good.

      Delete
    2. BadGal Waterproof is what I wore to my wedding. It looked good on but I found it sticky and smeary to apply.

      Delete
    3. Update! I ran a 5K in the Clinique waterproof (we had places to go after the race--I don't normally apply makeup for running) and it held up very nicely! No smudging at all.

      Delete
    4. Bobbi Brown No Smudge is awesome as far as waterproof mascaras go. Pricey, but if it's for your wedding, go for it.

      Delete
    5. I'm so glad somebody gave the Clinique High Impact a shout-out. I got a couple of samples of it, and I think it's fantastic. I have a problem with smudging too, and the great thing about it is 1)doesn't smudge and 2) doesn't require an ass-load of oily remover to get it off. That being said, I absolutely LOATHE having to go to the Clinique counter, since I was a pre-teen. Those women must be schooled in Advanced SuperBitch, I've never encountered such profound bitchery in any other line of makeup. Also, every color I've been advised was right for me by those ladies always gets returned after seeing in normal light. If I can't bring myself to purchase a new tube of Clinique when I run out, I'll stick with Maybelline's Falsies waterproof, that shit is absolutely the jam.

      Delete
    6. Clinique High Impact is the absolute bees knees! That shit just peels off when you want it to. I wore it while in Cuba for a week swimming and getting drunk and that stuff didn't budge. I cheated on it a few weeks ago and bought the Diorshow waterproof to feel fancy, and while it makes me feel glam, it smudges too easy. I'll be going back to Clinique.

      Delete
  18. Does anyone currently use CoverGirl LashBlast Fusion? (Purple tube) - I tend to love it but sometimes it can get clumpy, but I like it for the length it tends to give me and it amplifies my natural lash volume with the brush. I'm wondering about LashBlast Fusion vs. the Clump Crusher and if it's worth the switch.

    ReplyDelete
  19. I don't know why but all the CoverGirl mascara formulas irritate my eyes. About 2 minutes after putting it on my eyes start itching and tearing. I used to love Diorshow but I'm back on that Dull 'N Soft tip for life, basically.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. i know it was probably your auto correct, but i loved "dull 'n soft"

      Delete
  20. MAC Haute & Naughty Lash is my absolute favorite! It even smells good :]

    ReplyDelete
  21. The CoverGirl Professional All-in-One is my jam. I've tried a lot of different mascaras, from the LashBlast to the fancy stuff, and I've decided that that's the one. No undereye smudging, no sticker shock, no clumps.

    ReplyDelete
  22. I used to LOVE the CoverGirl LastBlast in the orange tube (the one Drew Barrymore promoted and then it was in her movie with Juno about roller derby). Black. Waterproof. Changed my life. And then I got the Sephora birthday present a couple years ago with the Sephora brand eye stuff in it and really dug the mascara. And then I went back to LastBlast and just didn't love it the way I remembered, which was a let down. So now I just buy the $12 Sephora Last Plumper, even if it's not waterproof.

    I think a lot of mascara performance is influenced by the brush and how you roll your wrist when you apply it.

    ReplyDelete
  23. I use Benefit They're Real for daytime-- very pretty and non clumpy. But it doesn't have great staying power--if I touch my eyes it smears, and at the end of the day it looks racoony. Maybelline Colossal Volume Express Waterproof in Glam Black is for evening--actually gives me much fuller lashes. It's a thick formula so to avoid clumps you need to scrape the excess off the brush against the side of the tube first. Sometimes I'll still get a clump or two when it first goes on but I just smooth it out with my fingers, never had to use a comb with it. Other issue is the damn tube doesn't want to close all the way--you have to make sure to close it REALLY tight or else it instantly dries out and gets all flaky.

    ReplyDelete
  24. I just want to say, I am liking the name "Clump Crusher"! I hope it paves the way for other aggressive-getting-it-done names like "Spot smasher" and "Bugger off blemish". Oh and "Undereye-undertaker".

    ReplyDelete
  25. What do you use to remove mascara?

    The once in a blue moon I put on mascara, it's ok though it gives me racoon eyes, but whether I use an oil- or lotion based make-up remover in the evening, my eyelids go angry, puffy and red :/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well I don't really ever use waterproof makeup and I use a mascara that comes off pretty easily, but if I have on heavier eye makeup I will massage on some of the non-foaming Cetaphil cleanser to loosen everything up; then I rinse that off with warm water and wash my face with my usual foaming cleanser. Cetaphil doesn't cut it for me as a cleanser but makes a great first-step makeup remover (and is super gentle/non irritating).

      Delete
    2. i use that shiesido oil cleanser if i am wearing full drag, but day-to-day i just use soap. maybe this is a dumb question, but shouldn't soap take the makeup off? i mean, it cleans stuff, right? am i missing something, or is makeup remover a ploy to sell makeup remover?

      Delete
    3. The Cetaphil moisturizing lotion will also work to clean off eye makeup. And then you get your eye cream at the same time, I guess.

      Delete
    4. Baby shampoo works for everything. Eye make-up remover, sensitive skin cleanser, shampoo (har), shaving, in a pinch will even substitute for Woolite in the gentle cycle. And a giant bottle of it costs less than a decent drug store mascara. The oily removers just coat my contacts and don't work nearly as well...then I have to use baby shampoo to wash that shit out of my eyes. I don't even have a baby, but i read you could use baby shampoo for everything in some parenting magazine while at the dentist office, and haven't looked back. (Don't get the lavender scented kind, though, not so great for eye contact.)

      Delete
    5. now i usually use the neutrogena makeup remover wipes to remove all of my makeup at once and it's usually pretty darn good. for just eyes, i like the small almay eye makeup remover pads. there is a moisturizing one and an oil free one - they're both hypoallergenic and come 80 or 120 in a container. they're, like i said, small - usually i use one per eye, but sometimes i can use one for both. they're super effective!

      before that i just used vaseline or aquaphor. those are ok too, but much messier. that's what my mom always did when i was growing up. i am tempted to buy a thing of baby shampoo now because i like multitasking products, even if i have the eye department covered!

      Delete
    6. I use unscented baby wipes. Just about any brand will do, except for the Hannaford brand (they're kind of irritating if I accidentally touch my eye with them). They're nice, cause you can use them to actually rub your eyelashes with your thumb and forefinger, and get all the mascara off (sounds awkward, but I don't know how to describe it), without worrying about getting anything irritating in your eyes.

      Delete
    7. I second the Almay eye makeup remover pads. I generally rinse my face with water/mild face soap first and take anything that's still left off with them. So I probably use half a pad for both eyes. Works well with contacts/really sensitive eyes. I always get the oil free though, or my eyes get weird slick.

      Delete
    8. Good old fashioned cold cream. I used to wear L'Oreal carbon black as my go-to clubbing mascara and would have to sand blast it off my face. The cold cream is cheap and effective, though messy. It's greasy as hell but I'll wash my face after I use it and my skin's still moisturized. Ponds used to have a cold cream gel, and that shit would eat you out it was so spectacular, but of course I now can't find it- Bastards.

      Delete
  26. My all time HG mascara is L'Oreal million lashes.

    ReplyDelete
  27. I'm sticking with my clinique high impact. It's got the good old bristle brush, not the plastic spiky kind that I see no point in. The one downside is it goes on really heavy, and it kinda screams IM WEARING MASCARA GUYS!!!! if youre not careful.
    So while this may totally promote eye infections or make it dry out faster or whatever, I scrape most of the mascara off the brush back into the tube so that the mascara goes on really thin, that way it's more buildable.
    I've been wondering, does anybody else do this? Or is this one of those "I'm late to the game and everyone else has always done this" things...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I do this almost always. I also keep a clean spoolie brush (like the sample brushes at Sephora) around to brush out clumps. I don't know where you get them, but I have a million left from 15 years ago when I was a Mary Kay consultant.

      Delete
    2. Huge fan of using a clean spoolie to separate my lashes after applying mascara. I think it makes a big difference. I don't remember where I got mine.

      Delete
  28. What happened to Max Factor 2000 Calorie? That stuff is the shiz.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I forgot that I used that stuff back in the day and it was awesome. Is Max Factor even around still?

      Delete
    2. Not in the US any more. I loved that mascara too.

      Delete
    3. They made it in red, which was awesome for us gingers. I used mine until it was dried in the container.

      Delete
    4. That was my go-to for years.

      Delete
  29. I went through like all the MAC ones but they all seemed to have something up with them for me... One smudged off, one gave me raccoon eyes, one flaked off, one was too clumpy. I found the Bare Escentuals Buxom lash at Sephora and I loved it, but now I'm doing the extensions (sane ones, not Kardashian ones) and I'm loving them.

    ReplyDelete
  30. When it comes to throwing away make-up, I think of it the same way as food. It may have an expiration date, but if it looks fine and it smells fine and it just generally seems fine, it's probably fine. But if it's weird, it's probably no good.

    Of course, that being said, I do make-up for photoshoots, and if it's on someone else, I often buy all new make-up. If it's on me, my eyeballs can fall out, it's my own fault.

    But I'm glad you suggested this. I have to try it out. I HATE applying mascara on either myself or anyone else. I've cursed out mascara, and for photos, I usually just meticulously paint the eyelashes with liquid eyeliner. But this, I may try. Thanks.

    ReplyDelete
  31. L'Oreal Voluminous mascara with a curved brush foreva!!! I've been using it for like, 10 years or more. I've tried just about every other brand and brush type and I always come back to ol' faithful. Love!

    ReplyDelete
  32. I got Clump Crusher on Natalie's advice this week and I'm very happy with it. I started having a problem with "Panda Eyes" mascara smudges under my eyes. I tried the half-dozen or so various formulas I already had on hand (I also scoff at the three-month rule) but it kept happening. I don't know why it was suddenly a problem -- I'm guessing it's about dry winter skin and sleeping in super greasy creams? The only thing that helped was an extra heavy layer of powder under my eyes, which is not ideal on dry winter over 40 skin. So, short story long -- Clump Crusher. No clumps AND no panda eyes. I may actually toss some of the vintage mascaras haunting my vanity.

    ReplyDelete
  33. I've been using Rimmel Scandaleyes for awhile now, and despite that completely absurd commercial, it's actually pretty swell. And it's cheap, which is always a bonus. If I have the money to splurge I really love Clinique Impact as well. When I worked in a department store I would hoard the little samples of it from the Clinique counter girls.

    ReplyDelete
  34. I have EED (eyelash erectile dysfunction). They curl beautifully, but if I use non-waterproof mascara on them, they flatten out in seconds. Even with heat. Not sure why.

    Anyway, the best thing I figured out is that if I use Cannonball by Urban Decay, it's a really good mascara AND it's waterproof. I thought I'd like Lights, Camera, Splashes by Tarte, but it did the same uncurling thing. Must have been the all natural ingredients.

    The only thing that's undesirable about waterproof stuff is that it's SO hard to take off. I have used just a tube of regular petroleum jelly as an eye makeup remover. Yeah, yeah, oh my gosh, you're killing the environment! Oh my gosh, so unnatural. Know what else is unnatural? Putting mascara on, beotch. :) So anyway, that's what I use, and it's really, really effective!

    ReplyDelete
  35. Man, I made the mistake and bought two different sampler boxes of mascaras - one was the Sephora favorites box and the other was a special on Hautelook. I have enjoyed the process of trying them, but if there ever was a time rule for them, I've screwed myself over thoroughly. I have been wearing a lot more mascara than I used to.

    I'm still working through them, but I think my favorite so far is probably the bareMinerals Flawless Definition mascara (with rubber bristles). I don't know what they do to that stuff, but it separates like crazy and gives quite nice length. I also really like Smashbox Full Exposure, the tarte mascaras, and - though it may sound typical - Lancome Definicils. Those are all fantastic. I'm sure I'm forgetting some, but I definitely recommend all of those.

    ReplyDelete
  36. I am currently loving Maybelline The Falsies in Black Drama. I use waterproof and do not have much of a dumping issue... I also blot my brush before I use it and apply several light coats instead of one thick coat.
    Does anyone have problems with getting black marks on their brow bone? Since the dawn of my make up wearing years I have gotten little streaks of mascara up near my eyebrow several times a day. I have tried many formulas but with the same result... I am starting to think that I just have an inconvenient face structure at this point.

    ReplyDelete
  37. I'm with you, natalie. I only toss out mascara when it starts to look/smell funky.

    I always use waterproof mascara b/c I have a wonderful combo of oily skin and contact lens user (I'm fond of circle lenses but they dry my shit out. So I use these Japanese eyedrops for them and while they work really well, they make my eyes tear up like mad so yeah, waterproof it is). I also hear that waterproof mascara holds a curl better than non waterproof? I'm East Asian so I have short, straight eyelashes and need it. Occasionally I'll use falsies but most of the time I can't be arsed.

    Right now, I swear by the L'oreal false fiber mascara. I've tried every drugstore formula under the sun and the others just aren't as good in my experience. I was less than impressed with Lash Blast but I have been using waterproof, so that might make a difference. Haven't tried the more expensive ones, but perhaps I will try some asian brands.

    ReplyDelete
  38. I am always looking for the best mascara that will indeed fill my life with rainbows and unicorns. After almost 30 years of makeup-wearing I should know by now that it won't happen. But my dumb delusional ass keeps trying.

    I have chronic dry eye. I have to put in eyedrops 10000x a day. Allergic to Restasis drops, so no other option (stupid dry eye also ensured that contacts and I are never ever ever getting back together). Bobbi Brown No Smudge Waterproof indeed does not smudge, but it is also not cheap. It does OK but doesn't do much as far as length. Thickens OK. But I'm a little worried about waterproof on my lashes every day... seems it will make them brittle. I dunno.

    Clump Crusher is pretty good and doesn't smear-- which means a lot with all the drops I use. Like Natalie says, it'll do. I'll likely stick with this one for awhile. I have fine hair and that includes the lashes. I SO lost in the hair lottery.

    My problem is most mascaras just don't stay on all day for me. I'm pretty good at aiming drops straight onto my eyeball and not getting it all over my face, so it's weird to me that so much of it is gone by the time I get home from work.

    I don't get the Great Lash love. All that shit does for me is give me raccoon eyes within an hour.

    ReplyDelete
  39. After reading your article on this mascara I went out and bought it - I was that impressed with your photos! I usually never wear mascara because it's too much trouble (smeary, yucky, etc.) but you are right this one's a keeper. And usually when I put on mascara I don't see a difference - with this one I definitely did! Thanks for the tip. Love reading your posts!!

    ReplyDelete
  40. I have the Clump Crusher waiting to be tried (I tend to hoard mascara) and I'm looking forward to it now! I tend to try a lot of mascaras but Maybelline FnS and Almay Get up n Grow are always in my stash. I got a sample of MUFE Smokey and I love it, but I don't know if I want to shell out that much for a mascara I will keep for about 6 months. That's pretty much my limit-I find they generally get too dried out for use by then anyway.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Tried the Clump Crusher about a month ago. Pretty much hated it when I opened the tube but kept going back to see if it would get better/my other mascara was getting weird. The formula has aged well and I like it much better now. I'm still a bigger fan of the Maybelline Falsies non-waterproof ones, though.

    ReplyDelete
  42. I agree that brand new mascaras are too wet. I don't like when my lashes feel cold and the mascara transfers to my skin in one blink.
    The one mascara that I found to get INCREDIBLE with age is Tarte's Lights, Camera, Lashes! I'm a fan of big, bushy, soft lashes and this definitely did it for me. I got it as a sample and I just can't bring myself to spend the money on a full size. Does anyone know of a comparable drug store version that'll give big, soft, bushy lashes?

    ReplyDelete
  43. I have trichotillomania (for those not in the know, that means I pull out my hair, but I don't mean to - it's a compulsion) and my eyelashes are hella affected by this. A lot of the time they are shorter than normal eyelashes, or thin in spots because... well, because I JACKED THEM UP with my shitty compulsion disorder. Consequently, when I DO feel like putting in the effort to not look quite so plain, mascara tends to look a little weird on me, because there's just not much there to work with. I wear contacts, and I am not onboard with trying to do falsies, so my options are pretty much limited. Do you know of any mascara that maybe 1) increases length a little bit, 2) fills out that shit a little bit, and 3) doesn't completely suck... or am I just shit out of luck in the pretty-eyes department?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Me too! I have blank spots sometimes and to compensate I just make sure I've got eyeliner on and avoid mascara so I don't call attention to it. As the spots grow in I feel more comfortable wearing mascara. Right now I use L'Oreal Voluminous Original. It thickens and lengthens, but again, calls more attention to the lashes or lack thereof.

      Delete
  44. Have you tried the Blink mascara? It is around $20 and I've had the best luck ordering it on Amazon. The black and dark brown are both great. I've stopped buying any other mascara and just use this now - if I wear if 5 days/week, the tube lasts about a year. it DOES come off if you get sweaty and wipe your face (ie do not wear this to hot yoga), but otherwise it stays totally put until you hop in the shower or wash your face, and then it comes off in little plasticy tubes. I'm ashamed to admit that i find that part really fascinating and that might be why I like it so much, but it also looks really good!

    ReplyDelete
  45. I just wanted to point out that I have gotten some NASTY eye infections in my day and none of them were a direct result of mascara. The one thing that you really have to be careful of for eye infections is just touching your eyes in general, especially if you have a cold or other sickness where it can spread into your eye because that can infect enough to give you meningitis. Not to say that mascara hasn't given people eye infections maybe in the past but I can't say that its the number one threat on my list right now.

    ReplyDelete
  46. I know this is incredibly late, but I started using the Beautinizerator-Fiberwiggity wack thing just to add the weird synthetic fibers to the ends of my lashes after I've already used a drugstore volumizing mascara, and it makes them really long and pretty but the tube lasts like a year. Plus I assume (perhaps falsely, but I have never gotten eye-diseased) that since it isn't actually next to your eyeball you are at least giving your mucous membranes a buffer from your leprous year-old mascara. Semi-pro tip!

    ReplyDelete
  47. I considered this web site to consent to all in sequence on any observation camera definitely, there along with most of carecterstiques. which revenue that have always been rather satisfied to get this web site Photoshop Online.

    ReplyDelete
  48. Hi girls, I'm a student at Syracuse University doing a project related to this post. If you can help me out and take a few minutes out of your time to take this easy, fun and quick survey it would be much appreciated! :) https://www.surveymonkey.com/s/RALKsurvey

    ReplyDelete