Maybe It's Tomorrow, but Maybe It's Not.

I will be the first to admit that I never know what day it is.  Basically, the only difference between my days is that 4 days a week, the sitter comes to take my kid while I work, and 3 days a week, she doesn't.  So, instead of Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, I have "Must be a day during the week" and "I guess it's the weekend."  It's simple, but it makes it hard to write checks and remember what day I have to get my yearly pap smear.


This is  my yearly calendar:  "Must be a day during the week," "I guess it's the weekend,"(repeat those two 52 times) and "I better shower cause it's Pap Smear Day."


Anyway, I got caught up in not knowing what the fuck was going on, so I just realized it was Friday and I hadn't blogged yet.  Y'all don't get to bitch about it, though, cause I double blogged last week.


I thought we were due for a MISCELLANEOUS BLOG POST OF VARIOUS TOPICS, DICTATED BY EMAILS I GEEEEEEETTTTTTTT........

WHAT'S UP? CHICKEN BUTT.

I thought I would do a short video blog today.  In this video blog, I mumble about stuff, then talk about my new favorite lip stuff, and show you my new sunglasses.  I made a video to keep things fresh/keep our relationship exciting (making a video on my blog is the equivalent of surprising your boring old boyfriend with a blowjob), and also because I have logorrhea, which resulted in me wrecking my thumb after writing a note to somebody that ended up being a novel.  YOU KNOW HOW I DO!  I CARRY ON ABOUT BULLSHIT UNTIL I PINCH MY THUMB OFF AND I CAN'T FEEL IT FOR DAYS!!!


Here is my video:

Click through for links to the things I am talking about!!  And to read about other stuff!!

Washin' Hair + Keeping It Washed

I thought I would write about haircare today.  I don't mean to keep mentioning that I am writing stuff because I got requests for posts about certain topics, but sometimes that's why, and so I mention it haha.  I LIVE TO SERVE!  LET'S TALK ABOUT WASHING OUR HAIR!!

Stuff I Put In Myself: Stinky Pasta

I've been sick for the last couple weeks.  A fun thing they never mention to you before you have kids is that, when you have kids, they get sick all the time.  The important detail they leave out is how they always give the sickness to YOU, then you stay sick forever because you have to take care of them and take them to the doctor and keep running the house and feeding them and all that bullshit, so you never get any time to recuperate.  Last time I got a cold, I was sick for weeks until I got a sinus infection.  The sinus infection moved into my eyeballs and I had green snot sticking my eyelids shut every morning, and I had to pry them open before starting my day.  Nothing that gross happened this time, but I have had a cold for longer than I would have liked.

Glitter Nails/Makeup Blogging/Redesign

I. LOVE. GLITTER. NAIL. POLISH.


It is so cheerful!  When you are stuck sitting at a desk all day, seeing your glittery fingers clicking around improves morale.  Let's talk about it!

The Pig/Sunscreen

After my last post about the caviar manicure, I had a lot of people saying I should have fed that Ciaté kit to The Pig.  I understand the sentiment, but I decided against it because I couldn't really offer you an alternative to the kit that A) worked and B) costs less.  I will feed mad stuff to The Pig, but I want to kinda be fair about it, maybe?  I don't know, I just didn't feel like it was fair for whatever reason...


ANYWAY, today I am gonna feed something to The Pig, and it's gonna be awesome.